The downside of this is that now at 10 p.m. I'm feeling mighty tired, headachy and bonged up.

I've been trying hard not to think about the family crisis, and since I'm a few thousand kilometers from it, it should be easy enough. However, my mother seems to have a need to phone me all the time to talk about it.

I want to be a nice and understanding daughter - ready to listen and help her mull things over and all that. But boy do I feel like saying that I wish I could stay out of it all for a while. It's all just too much.

My mind just keeps straying to little details, like my grandmother handing me this little candle box right before my grandad's funeral... a little present I had saved up for and bought and given to her when I was a child. And saying to me that she doesn't really "have room for it now" and to please take it with me when I go.

Jim is shuffling about in his dressing gown, rubbing his eyes. I think we both need to be put to bed right now.


before & after